Ink drawing of items a person might have on a chaotic desk. A no smoking sign, a mug of tea, a yorur (not yogurt) jar, a notebook with a spoon on it, a bar chart labeled only THINGIES, a report that says Itemize-Used for bird specifications and rouge[sic] animals, a bottle of pills with some lying next to it. Own work 2023.

Dream resume

If you want a dream job you're going to need a dream resume

by AK Krajewska

I'm on vacation so I'm emptying my drawers a bit on you all. I found this experimental thing in my rejection files next to the poem I reposted last week. All those tears over rejections and half the places where my work got accepted are defunct now. I'm just gonna post it!

I wrote this dream resume in response to an exercise for a 2018 class, Experiments in Fiction and Poetry. I think you had to write it based on your real dreams. Then again, a lot of the class encouraged us to approach fiction as fibbing, a very freeing approach.

Anyway, I have weird dreams and excellent dream recall, so the main fib in this dream resume is like in normal resumes, where you leave out the embarrassing stuff and focus the interesting parts.

Also, like most resumes, my dream resume is out of date.

Statement of purpose #

A versatile and powerful dreamer specializing in flight, sex, and nightmares, seeks lucid dreaming situations.

Education #

Maintaining ongoing certification through continuing education in birds, skiing, sex, and horror films.

Languages #

Freud, Jung, Polish, English, German, Russian, JavaScript, Alchemical Symbolism, Folk Tales, Enochian

Experience #

1985-1988 Basic Nightmares & Hypnagogia

1989 – 1994 Extreme Longing & Painful Awakenings

1995 – 1997 Sex & Murder

1997 - 2001 Zombies and Tsunamis

2002 – 2005 Sex Again

2005 – 2015 Magic and Advanced Hypnagogia

2016 – 2018 After A Friend Tells Me Lucid Dreaming is Possible